If Disney Did The Bible

The Bible — be it the King James, the New International, or any of the more than 80 other English versions — is not an easy read.  There’s a lot that is difficult, confusing, or just downright boring (lists of who begat whom, anyone?).  Is it any wonder that most six-year-old girls are more interested in Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty than Matthew and Mark?  Well have no fear, theist parents, now there’s a solution to this dilemma!

Andy Holmes, creator of Gerbert the puppet, has created the My Princess Bible, a new board book that “combines princess-like art of women of the Bible with art more reflective of the modern-day princesses” who will read it.  Yeah, it’s the Disney Bible.  Of course it’s not the complete Bible — we don’t want any nightmares about bears, after all.  Instead, it’s a collection of 19 stories about women in the bible, with a 20th story featuring the reader; it “reminds the reader that princesses are daughters of the King and are loved by God.”

I can’t imagine giving this book to a girl.  If I were a believer, I don’t think I could support turning the women of the Bible into Disney-esque princesses with incomplete and shallow retellings of their stories.  As an atheist, I wouldn’t want to give my daughter a false impression of the Bible’s contents.  Still, I suppose some will find this to be exactly what they want for their daughters — a sanitized version of bible stories that teaches the importance of status and appearance for women.

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